Death and illnesses

Isn’t it crazy. If you fall sick, there’s only two ways it can go. You either get better or you die. No in between. It’s jarring.

I’m currently sick and if there was a waiver I could sign that would get me into heaven no matter what, I would k!ll myself just to stop this pain.

Because why can’t I swallow and my brain feels like pudding???

And being sick is so violating because in that moment, every memory of not being sick just disappears from your mind.

It’s suddenly like you’ve never been physically healthy before and you never will again.

It’s like that common feeling when you have a blocked nose and for the life of you, can’t remember a time when your nose wasn’t blocked. It’s jarring fr.

In case you people don’t get an email the week after this goes out, please give my favourite jean skirt to Efit, my phone to my brother and my unopened vanilla perfume to my mom.

Everything else is fair game.

All my anger and pain,

Esther🩷